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Essential Coffee And Tea Etiquette Tips
Enjoying a cup of coffee or tea is simple enough; however, there are some very important etiquette rules you should keep in mind. From stirring correctly to knowing where to place your spoon, these essential etiquette tips will make every sip you take feel just a bit more dignified.
We will also discuss why 'pinkies out' is a big faux pas, and what to do if you get a glass of water with your coffee. Pour yourself a cup of your favourite warm beverage and let's begin:
Learn How To Stir Your Coffee And Tea Correctly
The correct way to stir your coffee and tea is to wade the spoon back and forth, rather than in a circle. Imagine a clock face above your cup. Move your teaspoon from 12 o'clock to 6 o'clock and then back to 12, repeating several times to ensure your sweeteners and dairy have fully dissolved.
Be mindful of your spoon while stirring. Avoid scraping the bottom or hitting the sides of your cup. Not only is the noise disruptive to those around you, but it is considered poor etiquette.
For more tips on stirring your coffee and tea correctly (plus more coffee- and tea-related information not covered in this article), read How To Stir Your Tea (And Coffee) Like Royalty.
Remove Your Teaspoon When You Are Done Stirring
Once you have finished stirring your coffee or tea, remove the spoon from your drink. If your drink came with a saucer, place the spoon face down on the saucer behind your drink. If you do not have a saucer, a napkin, coaster, or plate will suffice. NEVER place your dirtied spoon directly on the table.
NEVER Put The Teaspoon In Your Mouth
The purpose of a teaspoon, in this context, is to add sugar and stir your drink. A teaspoon should not be used to sample your coffee or tea. If you are unsure if your drink needs more cream, milk, or sugar, take a small sip from your cup. This rule also applies if you are trying a new blend of coffee or tea and are unsure of whether you will like it.
Do not re-use a teaspoon to add more sugar if it has already been in your drink. Using a wet teaspoon in your sugar can cause clumping and encourage mold and bacteria to grow in the sugar bowl.
Always Keep The Saucer On The Table
If your drink arrives with a saucer, the saucer should always remain on the table until your cup is empty. The purpose of a saucer is to catch drips, protect surfaces from hot cups or mugs, and provides a place to put a small snack and your teaspoon.
When drinking your coffee or tea, bring only your drinkware to your mouth. Do not slouch down to meet your cup halfway unless it is filled right to the brim and you do not want to accidentally spill.
Do Not Blow On Your Coffee Or Tea To Cool It Down
Blowing on your coffee or tea to cool it down is not only unsanitary but could cause your hot drink to spill out of your cup, making a mess and possibly resulting in burns. If you are enjoying a hot beverage with company, blowing on it could signal to others that you are impatient or in a rush.
The most effective ways to cool down a cup of hot coffee or tea include:
- Stirring with a chilled spoon
- Adding a whisky stone or two (the large surface area of the stone can help cool your drink down significantly)
- Pouring more milk or cream in to your drink
- Putting your cup or mug in the fridge or freezer for a few minutes
- Using a cup or mug with a wider brim (more surface area allows the drink to cool faster)
There Is No Need For 'Pinkies Out' When Drinking Tea
Many people assume that you need to flare your pinky out when you are sipping tea, especially in Britain during afternoon tea or high tea. That is simply not true. The act of 'pinkies out' has become outdated. Many people who enjoy having afternoon or high tea find the gesture to be rude. Just hold your teacup comfortably and enjoy your drink in good company.
Take Smaller Sips Of Your Coffee Or Tea
When drinking coffee or tea with company, take smaller sips than you would by yourself. This is a sign of respect and signals to others that you are not in a hurry to leave. Taking smaller sips also helps you pace your drink, making the experience more relaxing.
Avoid Making Slurping Noises When You Drink Your Coffee Or Tea
Making loud slurping noises while you drink your coffee or tea is considered disrespectful and a sign of poor manners (unless you are 'coffee cupping'). The sound of slurping can be distracting to others, especially if you are somewhere quiet like a café, library, or bookstore.
Know What To Do With Your Napkin At Afternoon Tea
When attending an afternoon tea, it is customary to unfold and place your napkin on your lap. If your napkin is large, fold it in half with the fold facing your body. The role of the napkin is to protect your clothes from crumbs and spills, just like it would in a typical dining setting.
If you need to leave the table, loosely place the napkin to the left of your place setting. Do not place the napkin on your chair as this can transfer dirt from the napkin to your chair or vice versa. It is poor etiquette to crumple your napkin up into a ball, fold it, or place it on your saucer or dessert plate.
When you are finished at afternoon tea, place your napkin to the left of your place setting. If you are a guest at afternoon tea, keep a watchful eye on the host. If they place their napkin to the left of their place setting, then that is a signal that afternoon tea has concluded. The host is always watching the guests and will not signal the end of afternoon tea until everyone is finished.
Should You Pour Milk First Then Tea? Or Vice Versa?
Some tea aficionados believe the best way to prepare tea is to add milk first and then tea. This was the norm among poorer tea drinkers during the Victorian era, as the cheap porcelain teacups they used would easily crack when subjected to high heat.
Bone china did not have this problem. Those who lived in high society during the Victorian era would often differentiate themselves from the lower class by pouring hot water directly into their teacups before adding milk.
Many modern teacups are made from porcelain and ceramic. These materials are able to handle hot temperatures. This means you do not need to add your milk or cream first unless you want to.
Tea tasting tip: If you are trying a new blend of tea or are unsure of how much milk or cream to use, try the tea on its own first before slowly adding milk or cream. Doing this allows you to appreciate the aroma and flavours.
To Dunk Or Not To Dunk. That Is The Question.
Dunking your pastry or sweet treat in your coffee or tea can enhance flavours and provide a melt-in-your-mouth experience. However, this is considered poor etiquette and should be avoided in the presence of others.
Submerging your baked goods may cause pieces to break off and float around in your drink. Not only is this unsightly, but it can be a choking hazard if a piece gets stuck in your throat when you take a sip.
If a large piece comes off, then you either have to hope it sinks to the bottom or try to fish it out with a spoon or your fingers. Having a piece of soggy pastry waiting for you at the bottom of your cup is not a great way to end your coffee or tea drinking experience, neither is fishing for it mid-conversation.
Also, take a moment to appreciate the baker who spent hours creating the treat you hold in your hand. Dunking something that required precise measurements and attention to create is like putting ketchup on a piece of A5 Kobe Wagyu steak.
There are two exceptions to this dunking etiquette rule:
- You are by yourself in your own home. Feel free to dunk as much as you want.
- Dipping a croissant in your morning café au lait.
Coffee With Dessert? Yes!
Many sit-down restaurants will offer coffee and desserts after you have finished the main course of your meal. Not only does caffeine give you a little post-dinner pick-me-up and aid in digestion, but the bitterness of the coffee is a great contrast to the sweet dessert, creating complex and enjoyable flavours.
Countries including Italy, France, and Greece have long-standing traditions of coffee after dinner. Italians enjoy an espresso, French people pair their coffee with cognac and 'café gourmandise', and the Greeks have their own version of coffee called 'Ellinikos Kafes'.
Know How To Order Your Coffee Or Tea Efficiently At Coffee Shops And Cafés
When ordering at a coffee shop or café we recommend that you do not enter the line until you know exactly what you want. This prevents delays, especially during busy times like the morning rush. Once you have paid, move away from the counter and towards the area where you will receive your drink.
Many coffee shops and cafés have a dedicated pick-up counter where they will place your drink when it is ready. Many places will call out the person's name attached to the order so try to remain within earshot and listen carefully for your name.
We also suggest not ordering a drink with multiple modifications during peak times. Simple things like changing the type of milk, creamer, or adding an extra shot of espresso are completely fine, but rattling off a list of customizations longer than a CVS receipt is not ideal.
Do Not Overstay At Coffee Shops Or Cafés
If you have been sitting in a café or coffee shop for a while and notice other people searching for a place to sit, that is your cue to offer them your seat. Some coffee shops have strict time limits for customers to ensure that no one overstays and that a seat is always available.
Bonus Etiquette Tip: What To Do If You Get A Glass Of Water With Your Coffee
In some parts of the world, like Italy, it is not uncommon to be served a glass of still or sparkling water with your coffee. This is known as a 'sidecar'. The glass of water is to be drank before the coffee to cleanse your palate, then afterward to hydrate you. Having water before your coffee allows you to taste more of the nuanced flavours of the coffee.
Many European countries pride themselves on their coffee and brewing styles. Even if you are not familiar with their traditions, it is best to watch what others do and follow their lead. You may be surprised by how much rich, complex flavour you will taste.
Summary
Enjoying a cup of coffee or tea can be a relaxing experience, especially in good company. Knowing and following these essential coffee and tea etiquette rules ensures a comforting, pleasant, and respectful experience not only for you but for those in your presence.
Interested in more etiquette tips? Read our other articles:
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