How To Shake Hands Properly In A Post-Pandemic World

Whether it's before a job interview, meeting someone for the first time, or congratulating somebody on a job well done, a good handshake can speak volumes about your character. A proper handshake shows the other person you are respectful, confident, and honest. 

If it's your first time meeting someone, a handshake is part of their first impression of you, so knowing how to shake hands properly will elevate their opinion of you and could help lead to future opportunities.

The COVID 19 Pandemic changed how we interact with each other, especially after social distancing. Shaking hands may be uncomfortable for some people who experience or developed germaphobia. Here is our guide on how to shake hands in a post-pandemic world

A Brief History Of The Handshake: 

While the history on handshakes isn't certain, historians believe that it was a way to demonstrate peaceful intentions. In olden times, the right hand was typically used: since weapons tended to be holstered on the left side, extending the right hand would prevent the individual from reaching across their body for their weapon and put them in a vulnerable position. 

If a person was concealing a weapon up their right sleeve, the up and down motion of a handshake could also dislodge it. Other variations of early handshakes included shaking wrists, allowing the individual to feel a weapon hidden up the other person's sleeve and to keep their hands clean.

Historians also believe that early handshakes were a way of showing alliance or agreement with an oath, similarly to how we shake hands to seal a deal in the modern age.

How To Shake Hands:

Shaking hands can say a lot about who you are. It is an art form that requires a bit of thought and practice, but once you have mastered it, it becomes second nature. While there aren't many guidelines, there are a few to follow that will ensure that your handshake is professional and memorable.

When the situation calls for you to shake someone's hand, be sure that your feet are facing them and your body is squared to theirs. If they offer their hand, try to keep it in your peripheral vision. 

Do your best to not look down and stare at their hand. If you need to look down to see if they are indeed offering their hand for a handshake or trying to give you something, look back up as soon as you can while engaged in the handshake.

Your facial expression matters as well. A gentle smile before a handshake shows that you are relaxed. Be sure to look the person in the eye while shaking their hand as well. If you're speaking to them, say their name when greeting them or congratulating them. This adds a level of connection and also shows your professionalism, especially if this person is in a higher position than you in a company.

A verbal cue like "hello" or "goodbye", followed by an outstretched hand, is the typical protocol for a handshake. Something along the lines of "Hello, nice to meet you, my name is…" or "It was great meeting you; have a fantastic day/evening" while you offer your hand is proper etiquette.

If you are offering your hand to them, keep your hand positioned near your belly button and extend out a bit while keeping your arm bent at the elbow. Here, your hand is high enough that the other person should be able to see it in their peripheral vision.

If you are sitting down, stand up to shake hands. By standing, you show that you aren't trying to hide anything or nullify the handshake by crossing your fingers under the table. While it's still possible to cross your fingers behind your back while standing up, it's more obvious.

While engaging in a handshake, be sure that the webbing between your thumb and index finger touches the webbing between their thumb and index finger. Curl your fingers around the other person's hand with slight pressure. No need for a vice grip or an impromptu test-your-strength contest.

The amount of pressure you use for a good handshake is a bit like Goldilocks and the Three Bears; you don't want it to be too strong or too limp, but just right. Avoid a death grip. You aren't trying to break their fingers or show that you've been working out.

You also want to avoid a limp hand shake. Don't just place your hand in theirs, as this suggests a lack of interest. If you aren't sure how much pressure to apply when shaking hands, match the other person's pressure.

Most handshakes involve something called a 'pump'—the shake part of a handshake. You and the person you're engaged with will move your arms up and down 1-3 times during the handshaking ritual. When pumping, move your elbow, not your shoulder. Pumps should be short and concise; you're not swinging their arms around like a pool noodle.

A typical, friendly handshake should only take a few seconds. If you feel the other person loosen their grip, that's their cue that they're done shaking hands. Do not continue to hold their hand, as this may make them uncomfortable.

A subtle but important detail that is often overlooked while shaking hands is to gently lean toward the person you are interacting with. This shows that you are attentive and interested in what they have to say or offer. Don't lean too much or they may think you've had too much to drink and wonder if they should brace to catch you. 

Dirty Hands And Left Hanging 

If you suffer from sweaty, dirty or clammy hands, quickly run your palms and fingers over your pant leg or dry them with a cloth before shaking hands. No one wants to feel wet, clammy hands nor do they want to have part of your meal on their hands. Chances are, they probably don't want a snack for later, even if what you ate was finger lickin' good.

If someone shakes your hand and you notice your hand is stickier, wetter, or dirtier than before, don't wipe your hand right away in front of them. They may view it as rude or disrespectful. Simply clean your hand once you've finished conversing with them. If they keep you in a conversation for a while and your now dirty hand is bothering you, excuse yourself from the conversation and head to the washroom.

Sometimes the other person may not engage in a handshake and you'll be left hanging. This can be embarrassing, especially if someone witnesses it, but it doesn't need to be. At moments like that, just remind yourself that the time may have not been right for a handshake or the other person may not be comfortable giving one. There's no need to call them out or make a scene.

What To Do If You Receive A Bad Handshake 

If you've ever been on the receiving end of a bad handshake, you'll know that there's a moment when you wonder if the person shaking your hand has ever shaken hands before. It can be tempting to give them pointers or to make a face during a handshake, but it's best to avoid that. 

Proper etiquette is to not say anything about their bad handshake. You don't want to make the other person feel awkward or ashamed. They may already be aware that their handshake was poor. Give them the benefit of the doubt and carry on with the conversation.

Does It Matter What Hand You Use? Yes, It Does 

In western culture, most people shake with their dominant hand. The majority of people are right-handed, but if someone offers you their left hand, shake with your own left hand. It may feel weird, but the rule of shaking hands is whoever offers the handshake chooses which hand to use.

Scouts tend to shake with their left hand.

The belief is that the left hand is closer to the heart, so offering your left hand to shake is a gesture of friendship. Typically, this is only performed while in uniform. Sometimes this is done while the right hand offers a Scout greeting. Also, according to the Scouts, the left hand traditionally held a shield, so offering the left hand would show trust in the other person not to attack you when you are unshielded and vulnerable. 

Other Cultures 

Like Arab and Indian cultures shake exclusively with their right hand. In their culture, the left hand is considered dirty. The right hand is for activities like eating while the left was traditionally used for cleaning after using the toilet. If you offer your left hand to shake theirs, they may see it as offensive. If you are a guest of someone from a different culture, be aware of their manners and follow their lead. 

Germs And Post-COVID 

You may be asking yourself if you should still shake hands post-pandemic. While nothing beats a classic, formal handshake, there are alternatives. If you are concerned about spreading germs or getting sick, simply decline the offer to shake hands, state why, and offer a substitution like a fist bump, elbow bump, nod, or wave.

The other person should respect your decision and politely accept. If they insist on a handshake anyway, promptly excuse yourself after the conversation to apply sanitizer or wash your hands.

Alternatives To Shaking Hands

While shaking hands is the most formal way to interact, other less formal variations accomplish a similar goal. These include the fist bump, elbow bump, dap greeting (like going for a hug while shaking hands), high five, or non-contact alternatives like thumbs-ups, gentle nods, or the shaka, also known as the 'hang loose' (a closed fist with the thumb and pinkie outstretched).

Summary

Giving a handshake is a skill that is not formally taught but is highly valuable. A proper handshake shows that you can be professional in situations that call for it. A strong handshake can take some time, so practice with friends and loved ones when you can.

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