How To Politely Return An Unwanted Dish At A Restaurant

Going to a restaurant should be an enjoyable experience. That experience can quickly change if your meal isn't to your liking. The anticipation of seeing your server approaching with your food only to discover it isn't what you ordered can derail the entire evening.

What do you do? What should you say? Do you make a fuss or just eat it anyway? After all, you don't want to hold up anyone else at the table. In this article we will teach you how to not settle for bad food and how to politely send it back.

Inspect Your Meal When It Arrives

Once your server places your food in front of you, do a quick visual inspection. Ensure everything you asked for is on your plate. Did you get what you ordered? Are the sides correct? Is anything missing?

If you made any modifications to the dish (like dietary restrictions, allergies or personal preferences) be sure to check before digging in. Even a small piece of shellfish or nut hidden under something could give someone a nasty allergic reaction if they don't see it.

If you are unsure if your meal was made with the modifications you requested, ask your server as soon as possible.

Inform Your Server If There Is Something Wrong With Your Meal 

If you discover something wrong with your meal mention it to the server immediately. Many restaurants train their staff to check in with tables shortly after they deliver the meals, but if the restaurant is busy or short-staffed you can speak to any server that walks by.

The proper way to get your servers attention is to make a subtle hand gesture and eye contact with them as they walk towards you. If you have room, you can lean back in your chair to make yourself more noticeable but be mindful not to bump into anyone behind you or block any paths. Simply raising your hand and saying "Excuse me, my meal isn't right" in a calm voice is all you need to do for them to take action.

Remember to use "please" and "thank you" while dealing with staff. It goes a long way. Restaurant staff deal with impolite and rude people on a daily basis. Treating them with respect and civility will lead to a better resolution.

Do not click your fingers, whistle, holler or jump up and down to get a server's attention. This is considered rude and disruptive behaviour. Exhibiting this behaviour might get the servers attention but it may also get the managers attention. The manager will think you are harassing the staff, which could lead to them escorting you out of the restaurant.

Be Specific About The Problem With Your Meal 

Be sure to tell your server exactly what is wrong with your meal so they can fix the issue. Is your food under or over cooked? Too salty? Too cold? Did it come with the wrong sides? Did the kitchen forget the modifications or substitutions you requested? Did you find a hair or bug in it?

When informing the server, remain calm and speak to them in a polite and respectful tone. You can use a utensil to point at the issue if it isn't obvious. Refrain from shouting, making a disgusting face or shoving the food back into the server's hands. Impolite actions such as these may result in you being asked to leave the establishment. Some restaurants may even ban you.

It is important to remember that mistakes happen from time to time. Sometimes requests get missed especially during busy periods or if the restaurant is short staffed. The chefs in the kitchen are tending to numerous orders at once, a delicate balancing act that takes a lot of mental and physical effort. Always give the staff the benefit of the doubt (unless it is an ongoing issue, then management may be to blame).

Work On A Resolution With The Server

Once you have explained the issue to your server, it is time to work on a resolution. Many restaurants thrive on good service so they will do whatever they can to keep customers happy. This means you have some leverage when it comes to finding a solution.

Many restaurants will offer to re-make the entire dish or just the part that isn't to your liking and leave the rest for you to eat. In this scenario, your new meal will be placed ahead of other orders coming in to the kitchen; this is sometimes referred to as "on the fly" or "on deck" in restaurant/kitchen lingo.

If you do not have time to wait, you can request a new meal that takes less time to prepare or decline a new meal entirely and ask for your food to be removed from your bill.

Drinks, like wine and cocktails, can be remade quickly so it is better to ask for a new drink than have it removed from your bill. If you are consuming alcohol with your meal, we want to remind you to never drink and drive.

What To Do If YOU Made A Mistake While Ordering 

While ordering you food you forget to mention an allergy, dietary restriction or substitution to your server, you might realize it right away or you might not notice until your food is being placed in front of you. Regardless of the situation, you should still mention it to your server.

If you realize your mistake while the server is still at the table, tell them before they leave. Be sure not to interrupt them if they are dealing with another customer. The most effective way to get their attention would be to say something like "excuse me, can I made a change to my meal?" or "Can I get my steak done medium rare instead of medium?" before they start taking someone else's order or leave the table altogether.

If your server has already left, you can flag down a passing server and notify them that you made a mistake with your order. They may write down the change themselves and relay it to the kitchen or find your tables server and send them over to correct the issue.

If you remember as your meal arrives or just as it is being placed in front of you, tell your server immediately. Remain calm and point out the issue. Be sure to admit it was your mistake for not saying anything. Your server will appreciate your honesty and will likely take the dish back to the kitchen or suggest re-making it to your specifications.

Never accuse the server by saying things like "You forgot to remove the onions" or "I asked for fish… Weren't you listening?" It is better to admit you forgot and rephrase the request to "I forgot to ask for no onions. That's okay. I can pick them off."

If you are allergic to something on your plate, you can ask for the meal to be remade, but still admit fault. "I didn't realize this had peanut sauce. Could I please get it made without? I am allergic." In some instances, the new meal will be made and sent to the table free of charge. However, not every restaurant will do this so you may have to pay for two meals.

Four Scenarios When You Should NOT Send Your Food Back:

There are times when you should not send your food back at a restaurant. It isn't something many people think about while dining but we think it is worth mentioning. Many servers will argue that since there is nothing wrong with the meal, they cannot take it off the bill.

Here are four scenarios when you should NOT send your food back:

You Wanted To Try Something New But Didn't Like It

You see a different item on the menu that catches your eye. It isn't something you typically order but you decide to try it anyway. You take a few bites then realize it isn't as good as you thought. Now you are left with a barely-eaten meal, an appetite, and a larger bill.

Someone Else's Meal Looked More Appetizing

While looking around the restaurant you see a meal at a neighbouring table that looks divine. You tell your server you want whatever they're having. You fail to ask what it is or what the ingredients are. The server obliges and relays your request to the kitchen.

The meal comes out and you start to dig in. After a few bites you realize there's an ingredient you don't like. You aren't necessarily allergic to it but it has an odd texture or flavour you find off-putting. Since you forgot to ask what it was, you will have a tough time swapping it for something else.

You Are Too Full To Finish Your Meal

You ordered multiple appetizers, shared a party-sized plate of nachos with your friend and enjoyed both a soup and salad that came out before your entrée. There is absolutely no more room in your stomach for another meal.

Since you have already ordered food and have a running bill, you can ask for a to-go box for the rest of your meal. Then you can at least enjoy it later and not have it go to waste.

You Have To Leave The Restaurant Early

This seems like an odd scenario but it isn't uncommon; you are in the middle of a meal then realize you are running late for something (an appointment, date, movie, etc.) so you ask for the bill. While doing so, you request that your less-than-half-eaten meal be removed from it.

Your server will likely offer a to-go box instead of removing it from the bill. Regardless, the meal will likely be on the bill unless you attempt to dine and dash (which we highly recommend not doing, for various reasons).

Summary

Remaining calm, explaining the problem, and resolving the issue are the three steps to politely returning an unwanted dish at a restaurant. Knowing how to do so in a respectful manner is a skill that everyone should know. Remember these tips next time you are met with a dish that does not meet your expectations.

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