Restaurant Etiquette, Pt. II: Entering And Seating

Now that you have entered the restaurant, there are certain rules of etiquette that every gentleman should follow. Some are more obvious than others. In this article we discuss a handful of them and how to utilize them effectively so you and your company can have a worry-free dining experience.

If you have not read part I of our restaurant etiquette guide, Restaurant Etiquette, Pt. I: Before, it contains information on RSVPs, checking reviews, and proper planning to ensure everything goes well before even setting foot inside the establishment.

Remove Your Hat And Sunglasses As Soon As You Enter The Restaurant

You should always remove your hat and sunglasses when you enter a restaurant. This is not only good etiquette, but also a polite gesture to all of the people inside the restaurant. We go in to more depth on where you should remove your hat in our article Hat Etiquette: When And Where To Remove Your Hat.

You should also remove your sunglasses unless they are prescription transition lenses or medical UV blockers. It is important that the people you sit with are able to look you in the eyes while they talk with you. This is very important when building connections and trust.

Hats and sunglasses can be put back on if you are sitting on a patio.

Remember The Rules Of Coat Check Etiquette In Restaurants

If the restaurant offers a coat check, leave your coats there. You will be given a tag with a number that you can use to later retrieve your jacket. Do not bring your coat to the table. 

If a coat check is not available, most restaurants have a coat rack or hangers near your table. If they do not, then hang your coat over the back of your chair or fold it up neatly and place it beside you or on an empty chair at your table.

For more tips on coat check, etiquette, and whether you should tip or not, read our article Mastering Coat Check Etiquette: Everything You Need To Know.

How To Speak To The Host/Hostess At A Restaurant 

When you reach the host/hostess desk, introduce yourself with your first name and inform them of your reservation including the time and number of people. They may also ask for a last name or a phone number as well.

If, for some reason, the reservation has been lost, remain calm. Inform the host/hostess the date and time that you made the reservation and include important details like the person you spoke to who made your reservation or the email that confirmed your reservation if you made it online.

If the host/hostess cannot find your reservation, they will do everything in their power to accommodate you. You may have to wait for a table to be cleared, but you may be compensated with a discount, free food, or free drinks.

When the host walks you to your table, let them lead. In a formal business setting, it is customary for the person with the highest rank to walk behind the host, followed by their spouse, then the second-ranked person and their spouse, and so on.

On a regular date or with friends, following this rule is unnecessary. Typically, whoever made the reservation or planned the dinner follows behind the host.

Look For The Bathrooms And Nearest Exits Inside The Restaurant

While on your way to your table, note the locations of the bathrooms and exits. Locating the bathrooms will save you time from wandering around the restaurant or having to wait to ask your server.

Knowing where the exits are can be very important should there be an emergency inside the restaurant and you need to leave immediately. Every second counts in an emergency, so be swift and orderly if you need to evacuate.

What To Do With The Menu

If the host/hostess hands you a menu once you have been seated, be sure to thank them. Giving the host/hostess positive recognition early in your dining experience can lead to better service. If the menu is already on the table, you should still say 'thank you' to the host/hostess before they return to their host station.

When looking at the menu, it is best to keep it flat on the table or held upright at an angle. Holding it fully upright and hiding behind it may look like you are trying to avoid eye contact and conversations with others seated at the table.

When you have decided on your order, fold up the menu. If it cannot be folded, lay it flat on the table and place your hands on top of it. This signals to the waitstaff that you are ready to order. Grunting or tapping the menu to to get the waitstaffs attention is not polite.

If you cannot pronounce an item on the menu, just point to it when its your turn to order. Ask the waitstaff to pronounce it for you if you would like to know how to properly pronounce it. Mispronouncing words can be embarrassing and could get some looks from other patrons. It is best not to do that.

What Should You Do With Personal Items At A Restaurant?

Personal items like keys, wallet, phone, and other valuables should not be placed on the table for sanitary reasons. These items should remain in your pockets unless you need them.

Cell phones should remain in your pocket, or at least on your lap if you are expecting an important call or text. Placing your phone on the restaurant table signals to everyone that your phone is just as important to you as they are. Phubbing is common in social settings. Try to make a conscious effort to avoid doing it.

Read our article Important Cell Phone Rules For The Modern Gentleman for more tips on cell phone use in public places.

Do You Have Allergies, Dietary Restrictions, Or Food Preferences?

If you suffer from allergies, have any dietary restrictions, or preferences be sure to inform the waitstaff before placing your order. They can confirm if the dish you want to order can be made without ingredients that may case you harm or reactions.

Some meals and ingredients may come pre-prepared so removing specific items like peanuts or shellfish may be impossible. In cases like this, have a back-up meal picked.

Read our article How To Politely Return An Unwanted Dish to learn what to do when the restaurant gets your order wrong.

What If The Restaurant Cannot Make Your Order?

Sometimes a restaurant will run out of certain ingredients and cannot prepare all of the items on their menu. If that happens to you, simply choose another meal. The waitstaff will often inform the table when they are seating everyone.

If the waitstaff returns to your table after you placed your order and informs you they are unable to make your dish, ask if there are any available substitutions or what they would recommend ordering.

While most restaurants have chefs that have painstakingly curated dishes for optimal flavour and enjoyment, most have no issues with substituting things like proteins or spices.

If you do have to change or modify your meal, don't blame the restaurant. It's most likely outside of their control if their supplier is having issues receiving/delivering items in or if they had an unexpected rush of people ordering that same dish earlier in the day. 

Summary

The time it takes to walk into a restaurant and be seated can be very quick. Having these tips at your disposal will ensure that not only your dining experience is a positive one, but also the company you are with. Being a gentleman in public places takes a bit of effort, but pays off when others are comfortable in your presence.

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